Let’s Not Compare Traumas, Okay?

I wrote this awhile back as an invitation to friends who thought that their trauma somehow didn’t compare to mine in dealing with Hope’s death and so they felt like they had no right to speak to me about their hardship. It still rings true to me. I hope we can take it heart.

"We all suffer in different ways. Suffering is suffering. Trauma is trauma. I don't think it is helpful to compare one to another as it is all hard and life-changing. Because when we try to minimize our suffering compared to another, it minimizes what we feel and suppresses our emotion which does not lead us down the path to health. It is only recognizing authentically our emotions, suffering, and trauma and feeling the full weight of it that we can find health." - Charla Shaffer